Disclaimer: I have (to borrow an expression from the South) “acted the fool” in my own life, so I do not speak from moral high ground, just personal experience and what I glean from Words of Wisdom.
Do you have people that you will interact with at a party, gathering or social setting that are antagonistic, incendiary or stubborn as a blind mule? Is there someone this holiday season that you will be forced into interpersonal communication with? Is there someone that your spouse has warned you to be on your “best behavior” with?
Of course there is?! There is always that one person that has a personal agenda that annoys you, chaps your hide or downright gets you angry. They open their mouth and out spews every form of what sounds like “nails on the chalkboard” to you. (Remember: you probably sound the same way to them!)
You want to respond. Your blood pressure builds. The person has NOOO idea what they are talking about, yet they keep blabbering on. What they say, the way they say it, or when they say it affects you as crass, unintelligent, rude, annoying or downright offensive. You are a volcano about to errupt….
Let me help you–Don’t waste your words on them. What?! Be rude? Often in the Deep South, we equate silence to rudeness. So we’ll say “nice” things, but have venom in our heart, mind or tone. However, you can be polite without having to engage in conversation.
“Do not speak in the hearing of a fool, for he will despise the good sense of your words”
(Proverbs 23:9)
This holiday season take this proverb to heart and avoid even allowing the fool in your sphere of influence to hear the good sense or prudence of your words. Dealing with such people is a perpetual mine-field of offensive-given, offensive-taken, and attack.
A “fool” is the Hebrew word “kesil” which, literally means, the dull, stolid, stupid man who cannot be moved from his own narrow groove.
A fool is hard-hearted, often steeped in sin and self-absorption that sees no truth but their own. A fool will receive no wisdom but their own. You cannot convince a fool of anything. And when you speak that which is righteous, noble, pure and true before heaven to a fool, they will despise you for it! They will malign your name, criticize your motives, and say all wicked things about you.
Fools, in turn, actually will want to harm you. This is illogical, but a fool does not work, think or act from any area that resembles wisdom, rationality or logic. Fools seek vengeance, retribution, and retaliation. Engaging a fool is like trying to catch a rabid pit-bull by his tail (or lack there of).
- My counsel: don’t waste your breathe, thought or emotions on the fool. Commit them to prayer and love the ones they affect the most, do your best to avoid them, and certainly don’t engage them in conversation. Forgive them, truly. Smile and move on.
We do well to remember what Jesus said, “Do not give dogs what is holy, and do not throw your pearls before pigs, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack you” (Matthew 7:6, ESV).
Remember: You nor I are perfect. Forgiveness is one of the greatest acts of love you will ever demonstrate. Forgiveness does not mean blind acceptance, but rather the removal of the penalty. Conseqences remain and relationships change. Forgive foolish people, try not to “act the fool” yourself, and live accountable for your actions and behavior!
Do you have any stories that this counsel could have helped you in? I love hearing from you!
Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!