If we don’t teach responsibility, then we are accepting anarchy. We must instill in our children and in ourselves four deeper virtues that will bring harmony to our citizenry and beauty to our humanity.
“…speak evil of no one, avoid quarreling, be gentle, and show perfect courtesy toward all people.“
Titus 3:2
Certain elements that secure a healthy society are not being taught any more in our corporal lexicon of learning. As a result, when immature adults don’t get their way, they need crayons to color, “safe spaces” to process and outlets that involve destroying other people’s property. They chant curses, burn flags and are “too stressed” to attend a class. They have rejected all sense of responsibility in favor of a riot. Instead of being rebuked and chastened, they are encouraged to “express” themselves. I’m sorry, when I was a kid and I expressed myself in a way that destroyed someone else’s property or cursed someone else, I got swift and painful lesson in correction.
“The time is always right to do what is right” ~ Martin Luther King
Rejection of Responsibility. Parents, you must teach your children to be responsible. What we are seeing in our culture as a result of one group not getting their way, is a giant, collective temper tantrum. Parents, you must act responsibly and make your children act responsibly.
The “progressive” element of our society has rejected virtue in favor of violence, rejected courtesy in favor of cursing, rejected civility in favor of swearing and rejected responsibility in favor of rioting. There are four elements that parents must teach their children immediately to avoid another generation who can’t handle adversity or not getting their way: Courtesy, Civility, Reality & Responsibility.
The Four Virtues of Reasonable Citizenry
Courtesy – is the a general kindness with an accompanying set of manners from one person to another. Common courtesy are the set of manners that are generally acknowledge as polite and respectful towards others. Courtesy is not a demanded virtue, but rather a freely given virtue. Our children need to be taught to be courteous instead of cursing.
Courtesy is the true vestige of nobility. To show courtesy is to live humbly. Courtesy is a rejection of self and an invitation to others. To be courteous is to make the world a better place, a more agreeable place in which we find inhabitation more amiable. Courtesy without provocation turns the table on hostility.
“If a man be gracious and courteous to strangers, it shows he is a citizen of the world.” ~Francis Bacon
Civility – means formal politeness with elevated courtesy. I grew up and live in the South. We still say “Yes Ma’am” and “No Ma’am,” we hold the door for ladies and let cars go in front of us in traffic. Do you know that having a young man hold the door for a young lady is a sign of respect and courtesy? Of course she can open her own door! Civility has to do with formality. Formality is a code of manners and actions that demonstrate honor and respect to others. Civility is different than courtesy in that the onus of civility means you may not agree, but you do respect the position of another. Civility restrains the worst of humanity and promotes the best in humanity.
Kids need to learn these things! Teach your children to push their chairs in, to thank their host, and to eat food that someone serves them even if they don’t like it. Teach your children when they go to a restaurant to eat with a napkin in their lap. We are raising young men and young women, not barbarians. Teach your children to respectfully disagree. We aren’t raising robots or puppies, who must follow every order or command. We are training children to become mature adults. Mature adults should know some common courtesy. Sadly, our culture is being stripped of its formality and becoming very casual. Formality is good because it reinforces value and worth.
Your children will disagree with others. However, they need to be trained to disagree with civility. Civility is a controlled respect for others. Our nation just had an election with the electorate falling on extreme opposite sides. However, we must demonstrate a civility to others that we don’t agree with. Civility speaks of a desire to do no harm and respectfully disagree with an amiable dialogue. The best way to teach civility is to train your children to be consistent in their manners and to model the behavior yourself. You are your children’s greatest model. You are training your children towards incivility when you do the following: curse another driver that pulls in front of you, gossip on your cellphone or become demanding & act rude in public.
Civility means you can respectfully and politely disagree and not become enraged or enflamed with emotion.
Reality – means the state in which things actually exist. What this really means is accepting reality. You can’t change your reality until you accept that things are the way they actually are. Reality TV is not reality. TV is not where you learn your reality. The Internet is not where you learn reality. Your friends social media post is not reality. The greatest picture of reality is found in the Bible. Without a proper understanding of the Bible, the world will quickly become a confused and chaotic place.
Parents need to live in reality the Bible reveals first. Then they must apply this reality to themselves and then teach their children to live in this reality. Too many parents are living for a fantasy or in a fantasy. Fantasy is the state in which things don’t actually exist. The fastest way to live in fantasy is to live in denial. Parents must teach their children to investigate, study and to think for themselves. Most people make mistakes when they rush to judgment.
Reality is about perspective. This is why the Bible is so important. The Bible is your perspective compass. The Bible correctly calibrates your reality compass. Without the Bible, your true north will appear to be true north, but in truth your compass will be misaligned or spin widely out of control. Even a minuscule variation with your compass, over time, will keep you from your destination. Your reality is born out of your perspective. But, this doesn’t make you the authority on the way things really are. Now, with your children you are the authority. Stop letting your children create their own reality. When someone creates their own reality, they are living in a fantasy. You must bring your perspective to your children and your children into your perspective. A perspective without the Bible is an automobile without wheels, a ship without a rudder and a kite without a string.
The Bible is the key to understanding the state in which things really exist.
Responsibility – means that you are accountable for something. Progressives in our culture are teaching that we are to give our responsibility away and someone else can manage it for us. This only weakens our society. Parents, teach your children to be responsible. Responsible for their words, their deeds and their actions.
Every action has a reaction. Every a reaction has a responsibility. The best way for parents to teach responsibility is to hold their children accountable. Give your children things that they can control, teach them how to control those things and then hold them accountable to the standards you’ve taught them. Standards set the responsibility. The Bible is where we discover and learn God’s standards for living. This is why the progressives reject the Bible, they don’t like, want or agree with God’s standards. However, God will hold all of us accountable to his standards.
Let us then, with good intentions and great effort, set ourselves to learning and applying the standards God has set forth for men and women to live with. Let us apply them first to ourselves, our children and then to our government. Whereby, God honors and blesses his standards. May God honor and bless our adherence to his standards.
I greatly appreciate your “messages.” I find them spot on with the Word of God, and would like to share them on Facebook. This particular one is extremely good. If this could be proclaimed … and heeded …. by all Christians today, we would find ourselves and our children better prepared to face what lies ahead in our world. I sadly find that often Christian parents are just as guilty for failing to teach the virtues set forth in your post as are the parents of the world.
Just by way of introduction, I am a Facebook friend of your sister, Audrea. Although I’ve not met her in person, I feel as if I know her well. I was “introduced” to her by a former student of mine who is a friend of someone who knows your aunt! In other words, we are very close! I have followed her since the onset of her physical problems following her miscarriage. I have cried and laughed with her. I have rejoiced and still pray for her and her needs. She is a great blessing to me. Nothing is sugar-coated….just plain old telling of struggles, failings, and triumphs through the unfailing love and mercy of our Savior, Jesus Christ. Throughout these past years, reading all she has written, especially about her “rascally” brothers, I have been aware of the great love and respect she has for you….and for all of your family. I, too, am a Baptist preacher’s daughter, although on the total other end of the spectrum in age and stage of life. I am a retired Christian school teacher living in Illinois with my husband. We have three grown daughters, four grandchildren, and as of December 2nd, a new great-grandchild!
Keep up the excellent work you are doing. I will pray for you and try to get info on your blog out to my friends and family.