You’ve heard it said, “Good things come to those who wait.” Well, not always, sometimes more waiting just comes. But, don’t be afraid to wait!

Everyone hates a waiting room. Everyone hates waiting in line. We don’t mind lines if we are first, because waiting makes us feel unimportant, devalued and impatient.  But, purposeful waiting has value.

Waiting is a part of life, but it is not punishment. We most often view waiting as penalty. This is an error.  Pointless waiting feels like punishment. But, waiting is powerful when you wait with a purpose. If you need to see the doctor, but his waiting room is full, getting up and leaving is not going to get you the diagnosis or medicine that you need. The purpose of the visit was to see the doctor, the waiting was part of the process. If you need to get your car repaired, a good mechanic will take you, but you will have to wait. The baseball batter has to wait for the ball to arrive. The wise shopper has to wait for the sale to arrive. Sadly, we have grown so self-centered and self-absorbed that we rarely view waiting as a positive part of any process.

One reason that we don’t like to wait is that we see ourselves as the priority. We like to be waited on. Yes, admit it, most people if the truth be known like to be waited on. Now, we don’t want to seem that arrogant so we call it “pampering ourselves,” “taking a me day” or even recently I have seen “I don’t feel like adulting today.”  The reality is we really enjoy being waited on. Now, it can get uncomfortable if we actually think about the other people who are doing the waiting, so we don’t. We keep our minds on how much we are enjoying the experience and what benefit it is bringing us. We pay ridiculous amounts of money to get our hair done, not because it actually increases our value, but it increases our perceived value. We pay ridiculous amounts of money on shopping and getting new clothes, not because it actually changes anything about us, but because it makes us feel better about ourselves. We waste ridiculous amounts of time in and on activities that don’t actually make us any smarter, give us any more wisdom or create in us any more faith. When self is the priority, self is served. Self hates waiting (perhaps one very critical reason God makes his people wait).

Another reason we don’t like waiting is we don’t actually practice the habit or behavior of waiting. What we do practice is convenience, immediacy, and instant expectation. We do this because we want instant gratification. Delayed gratification has died. No one wants to wait for anything. For millennia, people had no choice but to wait. They were dependent upon the seasons, upon their families and their neighbors. They didn’t depend on the government, the news, the credit lender, their employer or the internet. Because they had no choice but to wait, they had to accept that waiting is a part of life–their life. We don’t mind waiting to be a part of life–just not our life.  In order to be effective at any thing, you have to learn to become a good waiter. A good waiter is disciplined, committed and faithful. But, most importantly a good waiter is attentive. Attentiveness is where readiness meets preparation. The best waiters are attentive to every detail and then move with certainty and anticipation. When you are a bad waiter, you don’t anticipate you react because you were not ready.  A good waiter has learned the value and importance of the behavior of waiting with a purpose and acts accordingly with purpose and anticipation.

Another reason we don’t like to wait is we are afraid to wait. We are afraid to wait, because we are afraid to miss out. We are afraid to miss out because we don’t view God as sovereign and faithful. In fact, most often, we live like we want God to wait on us. Fear is a part of life. There is no escaping the fact of fear, but you can be free from the fiction of fear. The  fiction of fear is the feeling of uselessness, hopelessness and pointlessness which causes worry, anxiety and hurry.  Because, we allow these fears to fester, we often live in a self-induced sphere of the perpetual fear of missing out. Social media has done some good.  However, a negative by-product of social media is the constant bombardment of seeing what you think you are missing (advertisers know this). Social media is a clever construct of fantasy for most people. Who posts their bad days? If they do, too often you get annoyed and  you “unfollow’ them or ignore them. It doesn’t fit in our afraid-to-wait-no-bad-days narrative. Social media looking at filtered parts of peoples’ lives often creates unnecessary pressure on you. This self-created pressure leads to anxiety, doubt and premature activity (called rushing).

Another reason we don’t like waiting is because we have been conditioned to rush. When you rush, you are in a hurry. To hurry is to act quickly with little concern for discipline or focused activity. The focus is on the movement not the mission. There are many things in life you can’t hurry and expect success. Ask any baker, any builder, any artist, any musician or any chef if waiting is a part of their process. Speeding things up is detrimental in many cases, actually in most cases. You can’t rush growth. Good growth takes time. Rapid growth often creates a pattern of instability and imbalance. Efficiency is not rushing. Efficiency is where productivity meets responsibility. Rushing is where impatience meets activity.

Maturation is a process that takes time. The world is subject to God’s law of time. God’s law of time is that he set it, controls it and you & everyone else are subject to it. You cannot advance it or turn it back. You live in and with the time you are allotted. According to recent reports, the world is actually slowing down by a millisecond each year. So, although we are speeding up our connections, actions and activities, the world we walk on is actually slowing down. God controls time. You are responsible for the time you have been granted. Waiting is a sub-law of time. Learn to wait and your time becomes more valuable, more useful. If you can’t learn to wait, you will never be effective at resting or at worshiping or leading people.

Effective leaders, effective parents and effective followers will all learn to wait well. They see that waiting with a purpose is trusting God with the outcome, with the unseen and with your time. Waiting with a purpose drives fear away and renews your strength. There are some things that you are not designed, gifted or able to make happen. Therefore you have to wait. God will send the response. Your name will be called. God will send the help. But, you have to wait. Waiting means God is working, most often in you or through you.

“but those who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.“

Isaiah 40:31

(c) Alex Vann, 2017