Category Archives: Millennials

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Effort is the Great Equalizer

Talent doesn’t advance alone. Effort is the equalizer of success.

If you think that just because you are the most skilled, the most talented or the most gifted, that you will automatically advance or progress or get the promotion, then you are sadly mistaken. Talent is important. Skills are important. Giftedness is important. But, effort is more important. What you lack in those areas, make up in task knowledge and effort!

Effort is the great equalizer in regards to talent, skills and giftedness. It is true that not all people are not equally gifted, not naturally skilled and not automatically talented. It is true in a classroom, on a field or in a board room that there are disproportionate levels of skillfulness and talent around you at any given time. But, there is one equalizer that will level your chances in the classroom, workplace, pitch, field or office and that is effort.

If you want to advance, give greater effort. 

But, first understand what effort is and what it is not. Effort is your commitment made and your energy sustained over time. Before you can sustain your energy you have to invest. A little bit of exercise makes a little bit of difference. A great amount of exercise will have a much greater difference. Think of effort like exercise. The more effort you give, like exercise, that is sustained, regimented and consistent will produce the greatest amount of results. Too many developing leaders or aspiring individuals think that one performance one day either on the field or on the job is enough to get the recognition or advancement they are looking for. Or they think that because they are more talented or more skilled, then they deserve to advance. Most people want to advance, but very few earn it. Effort is how you earn advancement.

Great effort takes time. 

To give the effort, you have to put the work in. To put the work in, you have to commit the time. Great effort takes great commitment. To commit means to bind to a certain course of action. Think of giving effort like bonding or connecting yourself to something–put with a sense of permanence. Effort is super glue. So if you aren’t super-glued to what you are committed to, then your effort will decrease over time. The advancement or progression that you are looking for most often takes time. The exception is that a person can show up and have mastery immediately. The rule is that to learn, progress and develop you must invest time. This time requires effort sustained. Time means you will have to wait. Most people see waiting as a waste of time. Those who advance see waiting as an opportunity to improve. Every day that you are waiting for what you are working for is an opportunity for you to get better, do better and get better results.

Four Phases of Effort: Preparation, Mentality, Energy & Action 

Phase 1 – Preparation.

Waiting is not wasted time if  you invest while you wait. Waiting is not resting. Resting is different than waiting. Waiting is the period of time or season from when you enter until you exit. A rest is a pause. To prepare you must work as you wait. To prepare you must train and hone your skill set, refine your results and improve your ability. Things left alone don’t improve themselves. Set goals, targets and objectives that will enhance the advancement you are looking for.

Alexander Graham Bell who invented the telephone said, “Before anything else, preparation is the key to success.”

Graham Bell who would eventually go on to found the American Telephone and Telegraph Company (AT&T) which still is in existence to this day, filed his first patent for the recording of the human voice a mere two hours before his rival, Elisha Gray, tried to file one of similar design. The bottom line in this illustration is that Alexander Graham Bell was simply more prepared than his rival. Prepared people find more success because they are ahead of others.

The reasons don’t matter, the excuses don’t matter, because the most prepared people increase their likelihood of success and advancement. If opportunity is the door, then preparation is the front porch. Preparation is all the work, all of the time and all of the energy you are willing to invest in pursuit of your goal. Success is discovered on the march of preparation.

Phase 2 – Mentality.

Your mentality is not just the attitude of your mind. It is also the power of your mind. If you have a weak mentality, then you have weak mind power. Your mind is powerful if you train it to be so. Mentality is formed over time and through conditions. The highest performers on your team, in your organization or in your office always have the strongest mentalities. You have to have great mentality because to accomplish anything of substance, to find any success, you will face adversity. Adversity is not only an assault on your physical capability, it is often even more of an assault on your mental capability. Developing a strong mentality is like climbing a ladder of mental discipline and emotional self-control.

Without a strong mentality you will never overcome strong challenges. Strong challenges crush weak mentalities. 

A weak mentality comes from allowing the wrong thoughts to dominate your thinking and from allowing emotions to run out of control in your mind. Emotions are a part of our lives and our thinking, but they must be checked as they appear. True, some emotion can help our mentality, but in moments of our greatest challenge it’s not the emotion that will carry us through, it is our mentality.

In 2019, in the Champions Leagues quarter finals, Liverpool FC was down 0-3 to Lionel Messi led Barcelona FC. Jurgen Klopp’s Reds would have to score 4 home goals and maintain a clean sheet to overcome the hole they had dug for themselves in the first of the two-leg quarter final. By 10:10pm that night, the Reds achieved the improbable and Klopp described his team as “mentality giants.” Riding the momentum of that game Liverpool FC would go on and win the Champions League title.

A mentality giant or someone with a strong mentality is someone who can withstand incredible odds, adversity and pressure, while giving or increasing their effort to produce even greater results. A mentality giant is someone who controls their emotions and controls their thoughts. They exert incredible mental, physical and emotional focus. They have the ability to narrow down the urgent from the critical and the distracting from the important. A mentality giant is practices a patience and endurance that his or her peers lack. Therefore, a mentality giant will achieve more even if it takes longer or is a more difficult path.

Phase 3 – Energy.

Energy is from two Greek words and remains nearly unchanged after thousands of years. The Greek words are “en” meaning “in, within” and “ergon” meaning “work.” Thus, energy is, literally, translated “work within” or “the work within.” This is what really separates those who wish and those who achieve: the amount of energy willing to be given to a particular job, task or responsibility.

Energy comes from within you and it is both physical and mental.

Energy is the ability for your body and your mind to produce into your limbs. Energy is both biological and psychological. In order for a human body to expend energy and utilize the “work within” sleep, rest and diet must be regulated and regimented. Too many individuals are too careless with how they rest, when they sleep and what they intake into their bodies. We live in a day and age where we have very little excuse for not being able to make wise choices regarding the nutritional intake of our bodies.

Secondly, rest is critical to giving and maintaining maximum effort. Rest is often over-looked, but the body and the mind need rest. Staying up into the wee hours of the morning mindless binge-watching or scrolling hour-upon-hour of social media feeds will never allow your mind to rest. In fact, it actually hijacks the mind and keeps it awake without truly being alert. This state is what I call the zombie mind: awake, but not alert; moving, but without purpose. Rest also gives your body the proper amount of time to recharge. Your entire body must sleep. You cannot sustain permanently and perpetually the same, continual usage of motion and energy. You will crash. You will burn out. And it will not end well. Rest is not a vacation–a total disconnection. A rest is a purposeful pause before continuing. A vacation is a hard stop before you begin again.

There can and will be no great efforts without great energy.

There is a third type of energy that is often overlooked. This is because it is the most misunderstood. This is spiritual energy.  Spiritual energy is the deepest type of energy. It affects the essence of who a person is: the soul. It can only be replaced and replenished by the spiritual and drained by that which is hostile and detrimental to the soul. The Apostle Paul wrote, “Finally, be strong in the Lord and the power of his might” (Ephesians 6:10) meaning the source of this spiritual energy/power comes from the Lord.

Phase 4 – Action.

Effort is action. To get to action the other three parts needed to be harmonized and synchronized. Effort is more than just what you think about. Effort is what you do about what you think. Effort is the fruit of your preparation. Your actions dictate who you actually are, not who you think you are. What you do is your effort. Many people today think they are giving great effort without actually doing anything.

Effort is action with sacrifice.

Now, what is sacrifice? 

Sacrifice is what you are willing to give up, let go of or even let pass by in the pursuit of what you are after. Sacrifice is something that is popular to allow others to do today, but not actually do yourself. Two of my daughters play very competitive soccer. The most competitive teams in our state play a couple hours away. When we made the decision to not just play travel soccer, but actually travel to train and practice with a travel team, each girl and both mom and dad had to count the cost of the sacrifices we were going to make individually, relationally and as a family. We wanted to make sure we (the parents) and each girl knew the full sacrifice, the full cost they were going to have to make.  Then, together we laid it all on the table for discussion, conversation, prayer and then the decision. Then, we took action. We took the step and kept on moving. The hardest step is not the first step, but he first correct step in the right direction. We often take steps, but they are the hard step, the right step or the costly step that will create the path to success.

Sacrifice is the cost you pay and keep paying while you pursue what you are after. There is no great effort without great sacrifice. This is the path to action: measure your movements, count the cost and then act.

Summary: 

Without a sustained effort, the results, the success and the progress that you would like to see will never simply occur. You don’t have to be the most talented to get the greatest results. But to discover the most success you can achieve, then you must give the greatest effort. Effort is composed of preparation, mentality, energy and action.

“Whatever you do, do with all your heart…” Colossians 3:23

 

 

 

 

Questions for Discussion or Introspection: 

  1. Why do organizations often value talent over effort? Can you think of a situation in your organization or team where effort equalized talent?
  2. What can be challenging about the preparation phase of effort? How can you prepare better in your organization or team? How do you think that might help?
  3. How do you strengthen your mentality? What hinders you from having a stronger mentality? How do you know when you have a strong mentality?
  4. If energy isn’t equal, then how can you have more energy to achieve better results on your team? What are barriers to spending or giving your energy wisely?
  5. Why is sacrifice so challenging? When is a time you sacrificed for something you wanted? What was it? What results did you achieve?
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The Secret of the Really Successful: NO

 

Redwall Leadership Principle: Learning to say no is an essential quality of any great leader or organization.

“The difference between successful people and really successful people is that really successful people say no to almost everything.”

-Warren Buffet

Success comes through preparation, hard work and seizing the initiative when opportunity presents itself. But, great success comes from saying no.  The truly transcendent leaders and organizations master the art and skill of saying no. Successful people have many of the same qualities and understandings in common. But, what is uncommon is understanding when to say no and then, actually, saying no.

Yes creates a series of new commitments: use it sparingly.

Leaders and organizations must keep their word, so when you say yes, you are committing the integrity of yourself or your organization into a direction. Yes always has unseen costs. Until you can calculate and count the cost of your yes, don’t give it. Reserve yes for things that fall in line with where you are already going. Otherwise, every yes that you give has the potential to pull you off course quickly. This is why organizations and leaders drift, because they are too good at saying yes and too poor at saying no.

Saying no is the key to staying focused.

When you say yes and you are responsible, you have immediately diverted part of your energy, resources and time into whatever else you have said yes to. Yes is a commitment. No is a clarifier. There is no focus without saying no. Saying yes to is the quickest way to lose sight of your target, cloud your vision or create complexity. No draws a line and holds to it. No sets boundaries and identifies targets.

Yes is the death of simplicity and the birth of complexity.

No is the greatest simplifier that a leader or an organization can have. Because, yes engages you to whatever you have just given permission to. When a leader or an organization gives permission to an idea or an initiative, energy, resources and personal platforms are created. People that have been told yes will fight to keep what they now believe is theirs. This is why there is so much friction in organizations that say yes all the time. When you say yes all the time you are devaluing the power of yes and neutralizing no. Everyone then begins to fight for their yes.

No kills yes.

No is final. Yes is continual. Many things (not people) need to die in organizations. No cuts the life off of unnecessary, wasteful and pet projects. No keeps people from falling in love with their ideas. Leaders and organizations are in desperate need of limits. No is the ultimate limit. Saying yes is often a sign of (a) I don’t know or (b) I’m too lazy to do the work of discovery and find out. Both of these you should instantly say no to.

A sign of maturity is in the ability to say no.

Immature leaders and immature organizations use no very sparingly and yes very liberally. This causes all sorts of problems: poor stewardship being at the top of the list. Maturity is often evidenced through discipline and knowing when to say no and using it is a sign of great discipline. Great success only comes through great discipline. And no is the key to discipline.

No says, “We can’t do everything–and we won’t even try.” 

No means longevity over popularity.

No makes you unpopular. But, greatness is not discovered or maintained through a popularity contest. Leaders and organizations are unwilling to say no because they are unwilling to be unpopular. Popularity is never a measure of greatness. Longevity is a much greater measure of great success. Popularity is present influence or power. Longevity is staying influence or power. Greatness is always more of a measure of longevity than popularity.

Jesus sure didn’t have a lot of popularity, but he sure has a lot of longevity. Jesus is the ultimate example of staying focused by saying no. He would perform miracles and then tell people, “Tell no one.” He knew his mission. He knew where he was going and where he was not. Knowing both your mission and your limits gives you ultimate freedom inside the parameters of those limits. This is where innovation is discovered, stewardship is perfected and organization’s strengthened.

Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’

Matthew 5:37

(c) Alex Vann

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Stop Wasting Your Time Trying to Develop Leaders

Character development is more important than leadership development.

We live in a world full of leaders who are empty of character. We’ve got more leaders, more leadership positions, more leadership titles and more frustration because we actually have less leadership. Virtue is dead. Character is on oxygen. Ethics have been removed.

If you want to make a difference in your organization, in your community, in your home and among your followers, then focus on developing character in those around you. But, your the character you are seeking to build better first be evident in you. Integrity is on life-support in our world today.

Work harder to build great people than you do great leaders.

There’s all this pressure in our world and nearly every organization (including the Church) today to build great leaders. It’s not healthy. Don’t be a leadership development organization. This is silly. How many leaders can you actually have? Everyone. No, everyone is not a leader and can’t be a leader. The sooner you make this clear in your organization, the more focused your organization can be. It’s too easy for organizations, teams and groups to have “leader fever.” Leader fever is an ailment that plagues organizations that try to create and turn everyone into a leader.

Let me speak directly to Christians for a moment:

Did Jesus ever say to make leaders?

No (emphatically). He said that the Church is “to make disciples.” A disciple is a learner, a student and a follower. We are not to make leaders. So when we try to make leaders, we are making a mistake. You can no more make a leader than a leopard can change its spots. You can no more make a leader than dirt can turn into water. Church leaders, your job is to make followers of Jesus Christ, not leaders for your organization, ministry teams and committees. Stop thinking about the Body of Christ like a Fortune 500 company. It’s not. True leadership is organic (more on that later)–organic being natural, innate or born.

Don’t do death by leadership development. I see more wasted money, more wasted time and more wasted energy trying to develop people who aren’t leaders into great leaders. I’ve seen more frustration, more pressure and fewer leaders developed. I’ve seen leader after leader kill themselves, blow up their organization because of some new book they’ve read, some podcast they heard, or some seminar they paid out the whazoo to get a golden nugget. So they go back and change everything and all they create is more frustration, more pressure, not more leaders.

Wake up and eat this nugget: leaders are born not made.  We used to believe that until we turned into a world where everyone is supposed to be a winner. Go back to your childhood. Leaders were always born–born in a moment and born for a moment. You can’t teach charisma. You can’t coach drive. You can’t make some be self-disciplined. Transcendent leaders have one foot in this world and one foot somewhere else. They are driven by a force no one around them can see and have an energy that no one around them can manufacture. But, they have a character that can be emulated. A natural born leader has a spark, or fire that no one put there and that no can put out. Everyone else who is not born a leader is trying to find that spark, trying to find that fire. Leaders have it. It’s in their eyes. It’s in their soul. Everyone else is trying to find “their passion.”

If you can’t develop leaders that’s your fault. So, stop trying and just work on building really great people. Somewhere this vision of the “super” leadership developer organization sprang into our world as someone who we must become. We’ve been sold to invest more resources to get better leaders. I tell you, invest in more relationships and you’ll get better people. Then, the leaders will come. Great leaders don’t like working with bad people. Stop trying to find great leaders and just work on building great people into a great team.

You need leaders. Every organization needs leaders. But before you need leaders you need great people. Stop hiring for leadership and start hiring those who will let you speak into their lives while they work really hard for you and demonstrate loyalty. Better a lot loyal with a little quirk then a not loyal with no quirks!

Leaders Have Vision

I find that many “leaders” today lack real vision that inspires those in their organization to stay. People stay for vision. Why? Because people have always and will always follow a leader with a compelling vision. People stay when they are energized and inspired. If you can’t sit down and speak to someone’s heart and paint a picture of where you are going, then you lack the ability to inspire others. You don’t have to be the most gregarious, but you better be the most grounded.

Grounded People: Foundations & Facelifts

Grounded people have great character. Grounded people build foundations, not give facelifts. I find that modern leadership development is focused on giving facelifts, not giving foundations. Foundations get ignored. Facelifts get attention. Work harder to build foundations in your life and the lives of those around you. Don’t give them a facelift. A facelift is a temporary stretching to cover a wrinkle a blemish or a defect. Character development is foundation building. Leadership development has become like a facelift.

The greatest leader ever, Jesus, spent no time in leadership development, and all his time in character development of those following. He picked twelve. Of the twelve, he had three: Peter, James and John.  And of the three, there was one. Peter.  In fact, the one time we read about when his followers jockeyed for a leadership position, he smacked them down for focusing on the wrong path. There was never anyone more grounded than Jesus. He spent three and a half years developing the character of those who would carry his message far beyond his feet.

To the Aspiring Leader

Let’s say that you’ve read this far and are an aspiring leader. Here’s my word for you: Stop trying so hard to be a great leader and work even harder to have great character. Be the most “beyond reproach” individual that you know. Be the most humble. Be the most energetic. Be the most encouraging. Take the most initiative. Be the most responsible person you know. Stay longer, work harder and give more than anyone else you know. Stop worrying about being recognized. Great leaders know where their great followers are and are not. God knows where you are. Rest in the fact that the Almighty knows exactly where you are and learn to be content, yet hungry. Learn to be humble, yet confident. And learn to have character not be a character.

(c) Alex Vann, 2018

 

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Podcast – Unlocking Millennial Myths

The truth is between technology, helicopter parents and a lack of perseverance Millennials are being told some myths that are affecting the way they work, the way they think about work and how they see their lives. And sadly, it’s not helping. It’s time to unlock these myths with a good, healthy dose of the truth.

Seven Myths Millennials are being told and sold today:

1 – The Myth: Development is someone else’s responsibility. The Truth: Development is your responsibility. Most development takes a while. Most Millennials don’t want to wait. There is an impatience problem with many millennials today. If development isn’t your responsibility, then you are waiting for someone else to carry you.

2- The Myth: If you want something, ask and it should be given to you. The Truth: If you want something, go work for it. Figure out where your organization is going and get ahead of it. Think of a boat. Paddle out in front of where you see things going. Don’t just say “Hey, someone needs to help me, someone needs to give to me, someone needs to do this for me.” Start by Going to work for it. Take initiative in the right direction. This is called alignment.

3 – The Myth: Showing up is work. The Truth: Work requires more than just showing up. Showing up doesn’t mean you added any value. Putting the work in is where the value comes from. You may not get recognized for the work that you do. Great results are undeniable. Keep working, keep getting results. It’s impossible over time to neglect great results.

Many Millennials think they are doing the right thing. Are you sure? You may just be doing your own thing! Do what is required of you. Sometimes that’s hard, takes a long time and is uncomfortable.

4- The Myth: We learn well in comfort. The Truth: Comfort is a terrible teacher. The most valuable lessons we have learned have often come from the most pain. Comfort is a terrible teacher. We live in a culture that wants to celebrate comfort. Celebrating comfort is a form of selfishness.

5- The Myth: The easy way is the best way. The truth: The best way is almost never the easy way. Life isn’t easy. If you believe that life is easy, then you’ve believed a lie. Life is full of challenges and uncertainty. If you aren’t careful you will plot a “risk-free” and “safe” life. I don’t propose being reckless in regards to risk, but you will have to make some strategic bets and take chances. Things that are easy to acquire have little value. Life is difficult. If you have an easy job, with an easy boss and easy assignments you will rarely get anywhere. Getting somewhere worthwhile requires great effort. Read the biographies of those people who accomplished really great stuff: they all underwent some really hard things.

6 – The Myth: You define yourself. The Truth: What you pursue defines you. What you give your time, energy and resources to is what people will remember you by. Most often what you will eventually find is that you are at the center of what you are seeking. When you define yourself, you are simply revealing that you are pursing yourself. What you find with really selfless people is that the pursuit is not about themselves. It’s something outside of them. The position never fulfills you, the pursuit does, if it is the right pursuit. You must pursue something greater than you. Pursue something that can truly make a difference in life.

Jesus told his followers to “Seek first the kingdom of God and its righteousness, and (then) all these things will be added to you” (Matthew 6:33). He was saying, “Get over yourself, get outside your self and pursue something greater than you.” I’ll give you the target. I’ll show you the way. But, you must do the work. You must be in hot pursuit.

7- The Myth: Information equates to learning. The Truth: It’s only learning if you apply the information correctly. More information does not equate to learning. It just means you are becoming full of information. Lots of information without application just confuses.  I see too many Millennials who want to poll a bunch of people and collect a bunch of information, yet still make the same mistakes over and over again. This tells me that they have actually learned nothing, because they haven’t applied the information in a way that demonstrates wisdom.

This world is full of complexity, uncertainty and challenges. You need truth in order to navigate the most successful and productive path in this world.

“You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free“

Jesus

 

(c) Alex Vann, 2018

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Podcast – The Millennial Mentor (Episode 1) – Other than My Title, Why Would Anyone Follow Me?

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You are not a leader unless you have followers. Everyone can exercise personal self-leadership, but not everyone will be a leader that connects and collects with followers. You will not collect followers until you connect with people. Even those with a title or a position, may not have real people follow them in real time.

To be a leader that others follow you must…

1- Demonstrate a care for others that is greater than yourself. Care is three parts: (1) concern, (2) love, and (3) loyalty. A leader who doesn’t show concern is demonstrating a selfishness. People love a selfless leader. A leader must show unconditional love. A heart connection is the deepest connection. Leaders must learn to love their people more than their position. Finally, a leader must demonstrate absolute loyalty to loyal people. A lack of loyalty from a leader to his/her people is an automatic eject button.

2- Hold yourself to high personal standards, but be ready to give grace. Followers need consistency in conduct. Leaders must have impeccable integrity and set themselves up as the example. Followers don’t want to follow leaders who get a position and them reward themselves with perks and allowances. Followers love leaders who hold themselves above personal privilege and perks. This also speaks to holding others accountable. A leader must hold a consistent firm line with everyone, but they must consider each one as an individual. Leaders make allowances for your people, not for your self. Be ready to give grace instead of giving grief. Leaders who start with grace are leaders that others want to follow. There are no perfect leaders and no perfect followers, so a leader should be ready to give lots of grace.

3- Set a positive tone with a positive attitude.  The leader is the the thermostat, not the thermometer. The thermostat sets the temperature, the thermometer reads it. Don’t do negativity. Don’t be naive, but start from a positive place and build on that. People follow positive people. Like attracts like. If you have a team or organization full of negative people, then your leaders are probably negative and the same if you have a team full of positive people. Drive negativity and bad attitudes out of your organization. Negativity is like mold. You can’t find it, but it stinks up the room. Positivity is like sunshine. It warms and welcomes.

4- Be the first to take responsibility. Don’t shift blame, pass blame or start with blame. Be ready to admit as the leader that you are ultimately responsible and it starts and ends with you. People want to follow a leader who will step up and take responsibility, even when it probably really isn’t their fault. People love a leader for that kind of a behavior.

5- Know where you are going and clearly communicate direction. People need a vision. They need to know where they are going. People would rather go the wrong way with a good leader, than to go the right way alone. This is why leadership is so important. It is up to the leader to not only provide the direction or vision, but to make sure the information is communicated clearly and timely. Followers like to be “in the know.” Most people if they are loyal can handle more sensitive information. Leaders must practice more sensitivity than secrecy.

 

 

Questions for teams to consider:

1 – Rate your organization 1-10 on how much you think people feel cared for. How can you demonstrate greater care for those in your organization? What will it take to get that number higher?

2- What is grace? What positive effect can it have on those in your organization? How do you hold high standards, yet give grace to others?

3- Rate your personal leadership on “positivity” and “energy” on a scale from 1-10? positivity:_____ energy: _____ : What will it take from you to get those scores higher? What prevents you?

4- How does blame make a team more ineffective and less productive?

5-What is the vision of your organization today? Compare your answer with others on your team. How clear is the vision and direction? Why is it clear or unclear?

 

 

(c) Alex Vann, 2018

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Leadership Word of the Week: Wait

Ah, this week’s word is a word we don’t like to hear and even more we don’t like to experience. We live in a give-me, give-me-now, what’s-taking-so-long society. And the by-product is that we are becoming cold, demanding and we are developing fewer high caliber leaders.

This week’s leadership word is wait.

To wait means you delay your response or activity until a more suitable or favorable time appears for you to act or react.

Waiting is good for you because it teaches you delayed gratification. We live in an instant gratification world. Instant gratification is the process by which that which pleases you is gained quickly. The problem with instant gratification is that it is short-lived and short-sighted. Not only that, but instant gratification diminishes the value of things that have to worked for. Delayed-gratification means you are willing to work and wait for something valuable. Delayed-gratification actually increases your understanding of value, both to yourself and of the thing or opportunity you are working for.

Waiting teaches you to tell your self “no.” And if we have ever been living in a day and age where we need to learn to say “no” it is now! I watch young parents who don’t feel like telling their screaming kid “no” just hand them their phone, put a video on and even slap a pair of headphones on the kid. What they should do is tell the child “no” and then when the child pitches a fit, enact their parental authority and merit consequences. If we won’t tell ourselves no, then we certainly wont tell others no either. No is a word that restrains us. We need restrain, because without no, we expose ourselves to unnecessary risks and temptations. Just because you want it doesn’t mean you need it. Waiting helps you discern your needs from your wants, helps you determine what is necessary from what is unnecessary.

“Waiting is key to developing others because it allows them to catch up.”

Waiting teaches you to when to say yes. Waiting is not all about no. It is also about when to say yes or when to pull the proverbial trigger. Anyone who has shot a bow and arrow or used a rifle understands that there is an optimum time to say yes and many other times to say no. Waiting teaches you to find the right window. There will be more options that you think there will be in your future, especially if you are talented and have a positive personality. Thus, as you learn to wait, you also learn when to say yes. Waiting for the right time, the right opportunity or the right person is the value of delay. Delay is not a denial. Delay allows the best opportunity to present itself.

Waiting increases your perspective. Perspective is the value of time over distance. And when you don’t learn to wait, you have a flawed, narrow perspective. When you have to wait you have the opportunity to see more and think more. And leaders definitely need to spend time doing both of these activities. Instead of rushing to solve a problem, first seek to understand the problem. Instead of cutting off a person who is talking to you about an issue, wait and listen to what they have to say.

There is a fear attached to waiting. We often think that if we wait, then we will miss out. This is not true. What we miss when we don’t wait is the best opportunity and the best option. There is always a time for decision and action, but it is after you have learned the principle of waiting.

Waiting helps you learn patience which is a key to love. Leaders must love others. And those who are impatient are often the most unloving. Love is patient. If you want to see those around you grow and develop, sometimes you have to wait on them to catch up and be patient for them to get it. Smart people are often the most impatient people. This is why so many all-star professional athletes make terrible coaches; the game was easy for them, and they grow impatient when it isn’t easy for others. Great leaders know how to wait on their people, because they value their people. Things you value, you are willing to wait for.

Waiting is fertile ground for innovation and creativity. Waiting doesn’t imply you stop working. It simply implies you stop forcing, worrying or demanding action that is premature or unnecessary. When you have to wait, when you experience silence, your mind actually has to go to work. And a mind at work is where the creativity and the innovation really happens. As you wait for your next opportunity, you have time to experiment and to test some ideas you wouldn’t normally have. Waiting gives you time to edit what you have been working on. Too many good ideas make poor actions, because there wasn’t enough editing of the idea going on.

Waiting can make you stronger. Development never takes place in an instance. A change in direction can take place in an instance, but changing direction is not development. A new mindset takes a while to set in. Any muscular development needs action, then rest. Waiting is a form of rest. Your mind needs rest. Your body needs rest. Accepting waiting as a form of rest is a mature leadership practice that all the truly transcendent leaders have understood. I love the Bible verse, “for those who wait upon the Lord, shall renew their strength” (Isaiah 40:31). One reason why we have such poor leadership and so many empty leaders is that they haven’t allow themselves to wait. Rushing will never renew your strength. But, waiting certainly will.

Waiting is not a curse, it is often a blessing. So as you think about your personal leadership development, allow waiting to be a significant part of the course. Waiting is good for us.

“I’m sure God keeps no one waiting, unless he sees that it is good for him to wait.”
-C. S. Lewis

 

 

 

*Today’s word is the fifth Leadership Word of the Week in this series:
1-Hustle
2-Presentation
3-Grit
4-Drive
5-Wait

I love hearing from you. Leave a comment and I may be able to reply. Keep leading, it’s need more than ever.

(c) Alex Vann, 2018

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Leadership Word of the Week: Grit

In a furious world full of snowflakes, we need strong men and women who don’t melt at the first thought of heat. We need to teach our children, our teams and our people to rise to the occasion and stop dropping our heads and evaporating when life doesn’t go their way.

We need to teach our kids, our teams, our people and ourselves one word above all others today: Grit.

Grit is being tough when you feel weak. 

Grit is both your ability to step into adversity and stand up under it. Grit is where your energy meets adversity. Call it perseverance. Call it endurance. Grit is where courage rejects fear. Grit is the place your heart grows stronger than your sight, your strength and your mind. Toughness and single-mindedness define the one who is filled with grit. In a world where weakness is being modeled and praised, we need a movement to bring grit back!

Grit leaves a legacy. But you will never leave a legacy until you first leave a mark. Most people today, because they don’t have grit, just simply leave altogether.

Sandpaper has grit. Sandpaper leaves it’s mark. Construction paper is colorful and makes all kind of cute dioramas, but leaves no lasting mark on its environment. The first storm and construction paper turns into destruction paper—a wet, weak mess. People without grit are like construction paper – colorful, but impotent. Sandpaper on the other hand is strong and makes an impression when rubbed.

Have you ever rubbed construction paper?

Construction paper can’t stand up to the pressure. Because, construction paper has a weak constitution. You, literally, can rub a hole right through it. But, sandpaper is made of a different constitution. Part paper, part glue and all grit (sand grains) makes sandpaper a formidable force for any surface.

Grit makes you formidable. We live in a pressure packed world. But, those with grit can handle the pressure. Grit allows gives you the determination to be undeterred. The world wants to crush you. Seriously, nothing in the world improves itself. It all decays. All the forces of this world will pull you down. We used to have men and women who fought for things and built things. Now, we just have people who want to be given things.

No one can give you grit. You get grit by setting your face like flint to hard things, clenching your teeth and taking one step at a time. Grit takes no shortcuts and keeps you in it for the long haul.

Grit makes sparks in your soul. The reason there are so many passionless people is they are looking for a passion instead of looking for grit. Grit says, “Give me the hard way.” But, no one wants hard things anymore. Our world’s mantra is “make it easy and make it sweet.” You will never learn grit that way. The grit gets sucked out of you and you become the wrapping paper instead of the construction paper.

Grit goes to work. Listen, life is not fair. Stop wishing it was your version of fair and just get to work. And once you get to work, keep working. I see so many young people without grit, without stick-to-it-ness. When they don’t get what they want. They quit.

Grit don’t quit.

Life is not going to go your way all of the time, in fact, most of the time. And life, certainly, isn’t easy. So, when life doesn’t go your way, you suck it up and go to work. This is grit. And grit is only learned as you work hard. Because, grit can only be learned as you work hard. You can’t learn grit playing video games or watching videos on the internet. You can’t learn grit by letting someone else fight your battles. You can’t learn grit by reading social media posts or listening to popular pundits. You can’t learn grit from having a mentor or getting feedback. You can’t learn grit from running from your problems. You can’t learn grit by hiding from adversity.

You learn grit when you don’t quit. We have a world full of quitters today. They call it “advancement” or “leaving for the next opportunity.” But, too many people leave too early, simply because they don’t have the mental, emotional or even physical fortitude to suffer through one fruitless season into a more fruitful one.

“Over time grit is what separates fruitful lives from aimless ones.”
~John Ortberg

Grit is a divider. It divides the morally strong from the morally bankrupt. It separates the winners from the losers. It separates the men from the boys, the women from the girls. Grit puts it’s big boy and big girl pants on and gets to work. Grit is the line between those who stay and those who just want out. Grit is the line between those who absorb the pressure and  those whine to get their own way and escape the pressure. Information will never make you stronger, but straining under hard things will always make you stronger.

Get some grit and get to work. Those with grit will outlast and out-perform those without it.

Grit means “getting results in-spite of trials.”

(C) Alex Vann, 2018

 

 

*Special thanks to my iron, my friend and eldest sibling, Aaron, for a discussion about grit that gave me this week’s word.

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How to Develop People

Developing people is tough, time-consuming and taxing, but as a leader it is absolutely one of the most important and mission critical tasks you will ever do. People need development. People develop people.

#1- See the need and the potential in the person, before the production. People need development. Productivity takes time.  Development is different than growth. Growth is what you see, development is what you don’t see. Production is what you see, development is what you don’t see. If you are looking for quick fixes and quick growth, you will not succeed for very long in truly developing those around you. You must train yourself to look for the potential in those around you. This is why the NFL, NBA, MLS and MLB spend so much money on scouting, tracking and drafting people with potential. They believe in their system, they can unlock the potential of the one they drafted. You must see the need and the potential.

#2 – Development takes time– relentless, intentional time. You cannot and will not develop people quickly. People are complicated locks that take time to unlock. If you want to develop others for long term success then you have to be in it for the long term. So if you are the one being developed or the one doing the developing, you must surrender your time. This is super hard to do, because we want to value our time. In the development of others, the greatest gift you can give is the undivided, availability of your time. When you give undivided time in the development process you are saying one thing loud and clear: “you are important.” When people feel valued they open their ears, their minds and their hearts.

#3 – Build real, personal relationships. Authenticity is critical in developing others. Initially, with most of those you are developing they will project an image and a persona that they want you to believe in. Your job as a developer is to unmask the one you are developing. Sometimes, masks come off easy, often they take much longer. Masks are signs of pretending and pride. Proud pretenders make terrible people developers.

#4- Teach principles, not performance. Anyone can put on a show. Anyone can interview well. The test of development does not come when you are on stage, but when you are off stage. The test of development comes through adversity, isolation and problems. Principles are timeless truths that guide choices, thoughts and behaviors. Performance is a reaction to a stimulus or a script to be followed. In developing leaders, there is no script. But, there are principles. That’s why a performance may feel powerful for a moment, but it doesn’t last. Principles are powerful, because they last and can be applied in any situation or any circumstance. They give guidance for uncertainty and when there is a lack of clarity. If one thing is for certain in the information age, we have more information with poorer decision making. Thus, we must instill, pound home and chisel timeless truths into the lives of those we are developing. Don’t be afraid to say the same things over and over again–repetition is the key to mastery.

#5 – Set Expectations and clearly communicate them. This is where many leaders go wrong, they assume before they truly set. Assumption leads you to die a slow, frustrating death. Leaders must never assume that those they are developing “get it.” If they “got it” you wouldn’t have to keep repeating yourself or spend time developing them. They don’t get it. That’s why you must set expectations, clarify them and set them again. You must coach, train, develop to the expectations. This is the responsibility of the leader to clearly communicate. The burden of proof regarding setting expectations and communicating them are on the leader, not the one be developed. Now, if they refuse to listen, that is an entirely different story and clearly they are not willing to be developed.

#6 – Release real responsibility into their hands. At some point you have to take the training wheels off the bicycle and let them fall. Now, you must do it in a controlled environment where you have already calculated the risk and set in place contingencies. If you really want to see your team develop, then allow them to fail. This is where all of the helicopter parenting and helicopter education is not helping produce and develop stronger leaders.

Failure is a valuable learning tool. The idea that no one is allowed to fail is simply not only not helpful, it is simply not even true. You don’t build and develop people by shielding them from the consequences of their own failure. Allow them to own their own results. The world is in a “blame anyone but me” mode. This is the environment we live in and develop in. An environment where failure is always someone else’s fault. But, often it is not.

Failure, if approached the right way, builds confidence. David stood and faced Goliath, not because he was Goliath’s equal or because he had more confidence in his ability (although he had great confidence in God), stood there because he had already killed a lion and a bear. And the reason he had killed a lion and a bear is because his father had given him real responsibility to protect the sheep. Jesse, David’s father, knew exactly the dangers his son would face, but he prepared him for danger. He didn’t hide him from danger. Those you are developing need to face the pressure of failure under your protection.

The Law of the Leash: Responsibility

Responsibility is a like leash. When the dog is young and disobedient, but full of energy, the dog needs a short leash. All the dog wants is off the leash. However, the better trained (more responsible) he becomes, the more leash he gets, until he doesn’t pull and jerk you around. Eventually, he graduates from the leash altogether. See responsibility as a leash. Don’t unleash undeveloped leaders, but increase the leash. Eventually, as they demonstrate results that accompany responsibility, take off the leash. But, give more leash, before you take it off completely.

The Law of the Leash: if you are responsible you get a longer leash, if you are irresponsible you get a short leash.

#7 – Above all, hold them accountable. Now, then, this is where accountability comes in. Responsibility demands accountability. This is the least fun, but most impactful part of developing others. This is where great people developers stand out among their peers, they are willing to hold others accountable in the development process. If the results don’t meet the responsibility, reasons need to be examined. There may be some legitimate reasons why the results are lagging. But, never accept excuses. Allowing those you develop to give excuses hinders the development process. I tell my team all the time, “You can be part of the problem or part of the solution, but never both.” Excuses are always part of the problem.

Many people in your organization say want more responsibility, but, what most of them are after is really more authority 0r perceived freedom. They want more power. Most of them cannot handle more responsibility and the accompanying authority that goes with it. The reason you must hold those you are developing accountable is because you have given them more responsibility with authority (power). If they are not using their power correctly, then you need to correct them immediately. This is why “promotion” should follow more responsibility, not precede it. As authority increases, so too must accountability. Far too often, I see more authority given to people followed by less accountability. This will never develop a person well. It will create a tyrant, a boss or a dictator, but never a leader.

What does accountability look like? Well, if the results are lagging and the responsibility understood, then corrective action (pain) needs to be introduced. Pain is an incredible motivator for principled, honest people. This needs to be a private conversation to begin with. Expectations need to be examined and questions asked. Evaluate the one you are developing by their responses. Sometimes, communication was lacking, materials unavailable or extenuating circumstances outstanding. But, when it is not those things, then there must be correction. Make sure the correction fits the consequence. Don’t be too light or too severe. Be measured.

Developing people is a high calling. It can be really frustrating, but even more fulfilling!

 

(c) Alex Vann, 2018

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The Formula to Teach the Young How to Succeed: D.E.E.D.S.

We’ve got to get over what the next generation is not getting and how uncomfortable it is making the previous three generations feel. We have the answers they need and they have the energy we need! You can’t stop change. You can’t contain change. And you can’t control change. But, what you can do is leverage change.

In order to be successful in times of transition, you need a fulcrum. A fulcrum is a physics term that has to with (a) the support that turns a lever or it is a literary term that means (b) the one who supplies capability for action. I like to think of a fulcrum as an individual whom which is used to turn a person or an organization. It can also be a person who helps others turn their thoughts and ideas into the correct course of action. Every formula needs a fulcrum. Every tested formula rests on timeless principles.

What this next generation is missing is simple: principled living.

Smart phones aren’t actually making us any smarter. One day we looked up from our smart phones and realized that we weren’t actually an smarter. We had just become buried in a swamp of information and a quagmire of feelings. Emotional maturity and self-awareness died with the advent of social media and photo filters. As we looked around this landscape where everyone else was still looking at their smart phones we realized a glaring absence from the way we live, the way we make decisions and the direction we are moving towards…the absence of principles. They were lost somewhere along the way when we traded honor for convenience, justice for popularity and the sacred for secular. They were lost amidst a deluge of information and the rapidity of technology changing the way we live. We traded principles for speed, for wealth, but mostly for popularity. Public opinion, which changes like the wind, became more important than principled outcomes. The new generation had their opinions which used to be tested by time and trials, elevated instantly to popular status. A generation that had been told everyone was a winner, then had their opinions, pictures and thoughts elevated to proportions that used to take a life time, maybe to achieve. What was thrown out were the principles of the past in favor of popularity and privilege of the present. The previous generations were not only exposed to principles, but had them ingrained along every stop of life. Leadership, life and learning used to be driven by timeless principles. What has been thrown out in the beginning of this 21st century is the importance of principled living and learning.

“A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.”

~Dwight D. Eisenhower

Principles are timeless and tested guidelines that contain truth for application in any situation or circumstance that give clarity for action and response. They are especially helpful for guidance in crisis, confusion and temptation. Principles are like guardrails for the escarpment of high and dangerous places, but also like goads to keep us moving when the temptation to stray into places of pleasure and comfort come calling. If you want to help teach and train the next generation, if you are a part of the next generation, a storm is coming and the thing that you will cling to that will save you and make you successful is principled living.

Let me use a Bible Verse and give you a simple formula that will help you live principled:

“…we are getting what our deeds deserve…“ Luke 23:41

This is part of the conversation as the two thieves on the cross full of a lives that demanded consequence looked upon Jesus as he was dying on the cross and realizing that his deeds didn’t deserve what he was getting.

The formula for success is found in the D.E.E.D.S. These letters are a simple formula for teaching and forming your life around principles. The word serves as a reminder of the principle.

Discipline: Discipline means training yourself for what may come, despite what actually comes. Discipline can be taught. Discipline can be exacted, but only you can be self-disciplined. Self-discipline is dying a rapid death in among a generation that believes that you can be whatever you want to be, do whatever you want to do and not pay a price for it. Discipline is the price you pay to prepare for success. Discipline does not keep you from success, discipline drives you toward success. It is a ten-thousand practice sessions that lead you to the perfect performance. It is the thousand of hours in solitude training when everyone else had quit or gone home that prepare you for the right opportunity. When you are self-disciplined, you are training yourself to face the unknown. This is why we’ve thrown discipline away, because we think we know our futures. We have become masters of our own destinies because information is so readily available. Discipline means doing the right things over and over again even if no one ever recognizes you. You do it because it is right, despite how you feel or how you don’t feel. Discipline is never a matter of the mind, it is always a question of the heart. Discipline is what leads you to effort.

Discipline + Effort

Effort: Effort is the not the great equalizer. It is the great elevator. Effort is both that which takes a few to the top, but many ride it to the bottom. Discipline + Effort is where the elite began to move away from the average. Average people are disciplined people. Elite people are disciplined and give maximum effort. Effort is the amount of energy you are willing to expend. Most people today are looking for the least amount of effort they can give for the maximum return. This is the loser’s attitude. This is the attitude of the entitled, not the elite. You don’t have to be skilled. You don’t have to have great pedigree. You don’t have to have talent in buckets to give effort in buckets. Everyone has the same amount of time, but not everyone will maximize that time with maximum energy. Effort is easy to spot, because it requires energy. Energy is active. Entitlement is static. When you add discipline to effort you sustain results. Effort without discipline creates a pendulum that will swing your results back and forth.

When I ask someone if they are a hard worker, what I am really asking for examples of their effort. Effort is how you measure work. It takes effort to lift your hand to your fork. It takes effort to chew. It takes effort to pick up a shovel. It takes effort to dig. But, it takes endurance to keep digging. Have you worked outside in a while? The earth yields nothing easy! Why then are we always looking for the easy way. Things that last are hard things. Things that fade are quick and easy. If you want with rock, you have to be able to lift it. Effort and discipline are what build spiritual and mental fortitude–muscle. Each generation will ultimately be measure by their fortitude.

Discipline + Effort = Endurance

Endurance. Ah, this principle is one that is seldom talked about, preached or taught any more. I’m not even sure that many of the next generation have any idea what enduring actually is and what is requires. If you lived through the Great Depression or the Dust Bowl in America, then you know what endurance is all about, because you didn’t have a choice if you wanted to survive. If you lived through World War I or World War II, then you know about years of war, losing hundreds of thousands of the best and brightest of the next generation, and living on rations. If you lived through slavery or indentured servitude, then you know about endurance. If you lived on the prairie on a farm, then you know about endurance. If you didn’t have running water, refrigeration or indoor plumbing, then you know about endurance. If your ability to eat and live was based upon the weather, then you know about endurance. But, what does anyone today know about any of these things? We don’t.

Endurance is patience concentrated.
– Thomas Carlyle

Concentration is critical to endurance. The next generation lacks an ability to sustain concentration. Concentration is focus with purpose. In order to be a truly successful endurer, then you have to get over concentrating on yourself. I will say it until I die, in development, you are your greatest enemy. In order to sustain, you have to not only focus, but hold and maintain your energy in a specific direction for an unspecified duration. The next generation just wants to ask “Are we there yet?” That statement was for little children on uncomfortable car trips before portable electronic devices and GPS. Stop asking that question as an adult. You must learn to concentrate or you will never learn to endure.

The problem today is this: abundance never teaches endurance, but endurance is absolutely necessary for success. Endurance is the ability to sustain discipline and effort through prolonged periods of suffering, uncertainty and loss. It was what helped defined “the American Spirit”–this idea that we would keep working, keep going that our bodies would fail long before our spirits would. That is no longer the case. We live in a world of emotional weaklings. Endurance is a question of soul and spirit. It is ability to say yes over and over to the right thing despite the wrong feeling. It is the ability to say no over and over again to the wrong things despite overwhelming temptation. This is because Endurance is not possible without denial, actually, self-denial.

Denial: Denial is the ability to say no. Self-denial is the ability to tell yourself no. No, this is not good for me. No, this will not help me in the long run. No, despite how I feel, this isn’t right. No, I should not respond, I should think spend more time in thought and less time in reaction. Better thought brings for better responses. This is an instant world we live in. We want instant answers, instant coffee, instant food, instant service, instant wealth, instant acceptance and instant success. But, life does not work that way. We must learn to say no. We must learn to tell ourselves no. The opposite of self-denial is self-indulgence. Indulgence is a principle you want to stay very far away from. People that indulge themselves lack restraint. Proverbs 29:18 says, “Where there is no vision, the people cast off restraint.” This means when you have no vision or the wrong vision, you throw out the ability to tell yourself no.

Denial is a part of waiting. Success is built over time, never in an instance. You may see success happen in what appears to be an instance, but it never is. It is always the result of seasons of preparation, seasons of struggle and seasons of sweat. If you can’t learn to say no, then you lack vision. A vision gives you guide rails or lines to stay inside of. Another word for these buffers are laws. No is the base of laws, because no is absolute. Be willing to hear no. Be willing to accept no. Anarchy and chaos is the absence of no, the absence of restraint. When you can learn to deny yourself, you become more selfless. Selflessness is the final ingredient in the formula of success.

Selflessness: Selflessness is the ability to put your self last, to see yourself only as important as those around you need you to be. We live in the most self-important generation ever. Self-important people are self-promoters. Never have so many unqualified, inexperienced and immature people touted themselves so highly. If you look historically at the strongest generations and strongest societies, they do not preach or teach self-esteem. In fact, they teach the opposite, that self needs no esteem. This subtle shift happened in our culture when popular psychology became more influential than timeless truth. The most successful people don’t look for praise, encouragement or recognition, because they don’t need it. Selfish people need lots of attention. Selfless people need no attention. The code word for attention today is “feedback.” We have over-elevated the importance of feedback. I have learned that feedback among the next generation is really a code word for “positive attention.” As soon as you offer negative feedback it becomes unwelcome.

Dabo Swinney

Selflessness pushes self away and leads you to service. The most successful leaders are those who see themselves as servants of the organization. They see that they serve the greater good. I heard the NCAA College Football National Championship Head Coach of the Clemson Tigers, Dabo Swinney say recently that his role as head coach was “to serve the 30 year old version” of the 18-year old standing in front of me. It requires selflessness to place yourself in unpopular positions based upon truth and conviction. You will never serve others if you aren’t selfless. It’s not that you think less of yourself, its that you think of yourself less! The selfless person doesn’t ever see themselves as arriving only departing. The selfish person is only focused on the arrival. Successful people keep departing, keep learning, keep growing and keep serving. You can’t be selfless without continual humility. You must chose to be humble, even as you are ambitious, seek success and and lead others. Don’t make it about you. Make it about them. Selfless people have genuine joy when others succeed. In fact, they have become so emptied of self, they make it part of their personal mission to see others reach their maximum potential and their calling.

Discipline + Effort + Endurance + Denial + Selflessness = Success

The leverage you need to succeed is a principled life. It is your character that matters more than your competency. It is your reality that will influence your destiny not your fantasy. You will become a fulcrum in your home, on your team or in your organization as you apply these principles to your life. Your influence and impact will both grow. You will not have to look for success. Success will find you. Success is like a magnet. It is drawn towards those who are emitting and sustaining the right attraction. We are in an exciting time on planet earth. To maximize our footprint and our legacy we must live disciplined, principled lives. A world in flux needs leaders who are like fulcrums!

 

(c) Alex Vann, 2017

 

 

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What Keeps Talent Connected – The Power of the Moon Pie

How do you stop people from leaving?

Simple, give them a reason to stay. The more reasons they have to stay, the longer it takes them to leave.

When I was a boy, my father pastored a small country church in rural South Carolina. I would often go on hospital and home visits with him. He was wonderful at visiting the elderly, the sick and the lonely. The lonely would always make it very difficult for him to leave. Sometimes, they would follow us out to the car, hold on to the door or lean in the window. They would tell a new story, ask a question or, the one that was sure to keep us longer, bring out dessert! I remember one dear old widow, Mrs. Kirby, she brought out the big guns: an RC Cola and a Moon Pie! That was worth staying every time. See, they didn’t want my dad to leave. He was meeting their needs. They were giving him reasons to stay.

Leaders today have to come on strong with reasons that help talent stay in the organization. One thing won’t do. It takes a talent strategy. The days of showing up and expecting people to stay are history. Reality is they are going to leave.

So what can you do to slow the departure down?

People stay on teams, in organizations and with leaders because of many reasons. The more of these reasons your people see and grasp, the harder it is for them to leave. Let’s call these reasons by a different name: connections. Connection is a word that millennials and centennials really understand. Because, the world we live in an upside down world. The people that work with you and for you have fewer meaningful relationships, are less emotionally mature and have greater anxiety about the future. They are entering the work force with bigger dreams, more debt and greater uncertainty.

Leaders, organizations and employers who create the following connections have a much greater chance at keeping their developing talent longer…

1- Create an atmosphere of clarity. Clarity produces a level of certainty. When things are clear, it is easier for a team member to make a connection–to see where they belong. Clarity is never found through complexity, but always in simplicity. As a leader you need a shorter, simpler and more concise brand message. Too many leaders and organizations are trying to be someone or something that they are not. This plays very false to a generation that demands authenticity. Clarity combined with a life lived driven by a passionate calling is a powerful magnate.

“There are few things more powerful than a life lived with passionate clarity.”
~Erwin McManus

2- Create a powerful sense of purpose. People no longer do things because they are supposed to. This is because somewhere in the past two decades people stopped teaching, stopped accepting and stopped passing on what was supposed to be done. Now, everything is questioned. This is reality. People don’t stay because they are supposed to. They stay because they want to. They stay because they feel respected, they feel wanted and they feel valued.

3- Offer ownership whenever possible. What is ownership? It is a sense of possession with a purpose. Once, people know their purpose, then empower them to possess parts of the business, the organization and the team. This is very difficult for the leader who wants to control everything. Empowerment never comes solely through instruction. It must be paired with investment and the ability to fail.

What?

Ownership is about winning and losing. No one wins all the time–that belief is fantasy. Leaders that win with talent operate in reality.  If you create an organizational path or track where there is no real possibility of failure, then you will never produce people who can win without you. And if they can’t win without you, they will absolutely leave you.

4- Make promises you can deliver on. Don’t say things to keep people you never intend on truly fulfilling. I observe many leaders who will say just about anything to try to keep people on the hook. This is no good. As soon as people get on a hook and they realize it, they want off. But, if people feel connected or plugged in, then they want to stay longer.  This is a generation that wants action, that wants results. When you make promises or say things haphazardly that you don’t follow through on, you create an instant disconnect–literally, you are pulling the plug. This is why simplicity of purpose, simplicity of structure and simplicity of advancement are critical. The simpler the promise, the easier it is to fulfill. If your organization can’t afford a perk, promotion or benefit, then don’t talk about it. Don’t say, “Well, one day we’d like to offer x, y, and z.” That’s no good. All you are doing is speaking into a false reality and you will pay later for it by your talent leaving you. In an age of uncertainty, people are looking for leaders and organizations to deliver on their promises. A promise is a commitment and the world is short on keeping it’s commitments these days. Organizations and leaders need to speak the truth and keep it. Otherwise, keep your mouth shut. Don’t talk about one day…talk about today! 

“Always prefer the plain direct word to the long, vague one. Don’t implement promises, but keep them.”

~C. S. Lewis

5- Be generous with your personal time. Be generous with your time. Leaders that give their time freely to their subordinates inadvertently kill bureaucracy. Don’t make people pay for your time. You are busy. You are a leader. Leaders are busy. Everyone knows that. Personal one-on-one or small group settings are hugely instrumental for the leaders of tomorrow. Giving your personal time is an investment into the lives of the next generation. They have access to an abundance of information, but little to no access to wisdom and experience. This is why spending time with you is so valuable to them. Even if you don’t think they are listening, they are. You are the model. The best models can be studied up close. The best models invite careful scrutiny and the freedom to explore. If you are an absent leader or a distracted leader, then you will never unlock the potential of those developing leaders in your organization.

“You have had many instructors but few fathers, therefore, imitate me…“

Paul, the Apostle

6- Invest resources when it makes sense. Often, organizations today just throw money at people as if it will solve the problem. Let me tell you the problem with this “solution”: money can’t create value, it demands to be valued. For example, you offer to pay a person more money to stay with you or start them at a higher rate. All you have done is wage into a bidding war that is easily outdone by the person or organization that comes along and offers more money at a later date. Money is a race with no winner. Because money and perks are unable to satisfy the deepest longings of a persons need for acceptance and value. I tell my team, “I want you to make more money. In fact, I want to pay you more. So, let’s get to work on making this organization more productive. A high tide rises all ships.” When you make it about the money, you enter a path that is impossible to return from. Instead of “paying people more” the solution is to “invest in people more.” It’s subtle, but it’s a mindset shift. It places the emphasis on the people instead of the resource.

7- Tell great stories that promote people. People love stories. People want stories told about them. Get good at telling stories. We have so many forms of media, so many channels by which to tell stories of our people that we have no reason not to. Find people in your organization and (with their permission) tell their story. Media is simply an avenue at telling stories. Humans can not resist a good story. The better you are at telling true stories, the more inspired your people will be to stay with you, especially when you start telling their story. I have a couple of former all-American athletes that work with me. Every time I introduce them, I say, “This is Mandy or Steph, she was an All-American at…” One day, with a huge smile on her face Mandy a college graduate and record-setting All-American soccer player said, “Why do you always tell people I was an All-American when I played in college?” I responded, “Do you like being introduced that way?” She said with a bigger smile, “Yes…” I simply replied, “That’s why!”

The key to winning people is connecting with them, especially at the deepest level the heart. If you only see your people as assets or liabilities for your benefit, your revolving door will move much quicker. See, everyone has a revolving door on talent these days. The solution is not to get mad at the door or live in denial that such a door exists, but to slow the door down. When people connect with you, your purpose/calling and they feel valued, the bottom line is they stay longer.

Talent is a revolving door. You don’t need a new door, when all you need is to slow the door down.

 

 

(c) Alex Vann, 2017