“Early to bed, early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.” 

~Benjamin Franklin

Hey, Parents, your kids need more sleep.

According to a recent survey, children these days are averaging over an hour less of sleep a night than 30 years ago. This is creating a wealth of problems not a healthy child.

The notion that your kids will “catch up” on sleep this weekend is a foolish notion that makes little sense and even less of a healthy child. When you “catch up” on sleep you are creating an abnormal sleep cycle. An abnormal sleep cycle messes with the innate physiological clock that exists in every person. Children need this clock to function as normally, as scheduled as possible. Catching-up on sleep is like winding your clock forward, then backwards, then forward, then the alarm going off, then backwards again…it’s a terrible cycle for a clock, even more for a child.

Bottom line: Children need consistent, scheduled sleep.

Why?

They are growing. Growing children need enough sleep each night to assist their body in maintaining peak health. They are growing physiologically, mentally and emotionally. The National Sleep Foundation says that children ages 6 to 13 need an average of 9 to 11 hours of sleep every evening. I once had a child I was coaching in basketball brag to me how he stayed up all night playing video games. We were about to play a game, and I said, “I know you think  I’ll be impressed that you haven’t gone to sleep all night, but I’m not.” Of course, he played even extra worse than he normally did. Sleep deprivation makes children cranky, uncoordinated, sluggish, un-alert and not mentally sharp.

Your body is not designed to function without sleep. Sleep deprivation is a torture technique! If you are an adult and need your rest, how much more do you children need it?

I am often appalled at what I hear about bedtimes of children. Maybe, no one has told you, but your children need more sleep and less video games. Video games, iPads and tv’s aren’t your children’s parents. Completing the next level doesn’t denote bedtime–you the parent do.You, the living and breathing adult, are the parent. It is your responsibility to train your child. A properly trained child is a properly prepared child. A home where training is haphazard, lackadaisical and arbitrary is an un-disciplined and disordered home. Your children need structure, order, discipline, nutritious food and sleep. Parental neglect is at an all-time high. We need to reverse this cycle and return parental engagement to its rightful place! 

A proper ending to one day is instrumental in a proper beginning for the next day.

Don’t use this excuse: “Mom and Dad, but I’m just not tired.” Children think they aren’t tired and you believe them and you both are wrong!  This happens more frequently now because we are allowing our children to be stimulated differently. Now, their brains have been overstimulated by digital distraction creating a catatonic euphoria. This digital distraction creates an overstimulation in the mind that betrays the physiological need for the body to rest. The body doesn’t get the rest it needs and this affects the next day and the day after that (ever experienced jet-lag?). This is like jet-lag for kids without the expensive plane ticket.

Your child needs physical stimulation more than digital stimulation. I am not against video games (as a hobby, not a lifestyle). But, prolonged digital activity does not promote a healthy lifestyle. Spending all afternoon and evening playing video games does not expend the energy your child needs to burn in order to help him/her get a good night’s rest.

Don’t use this excuse: “My child doesn’t require as much sleep.” Normally, this is a cover-up or just blind ignorance by the parent. Children are all made the same way, all have the same growth cycle and all grow generally in the same way. Your child is not an exception. This excuse probably means that your child can’t calm him/herself down to sleep. The primary culprit: anxiety. Children are facing more pressure and experiencing more anxiety than previous generations. Children’s exposure to horror movies and video games, pornography, violence, bloodshed, sexually provocative scenes, anger and massive swings of adrenaline are all keeping your kids awake at night. Add in the pressures of mean kids at school, homework and extra-circular activities, your children are exposed more today than ever before.

Hints at Helping Your Child Sleep Better:

–Parents must act as their child’s guardian angel. This means, parents put your children to bed until they leave your house. Make bed-time a special ritual in your home. Don’t rush it, yell or totally disregard it. Make bed-time a treasure-time. It will be magic for you and your kids (and really your grandkids one day too). Make bed-time a safe time. The more secure your child feels, the better they will sleep.

3 S’s of Bedtime: 

1. Structured. Routines are good for kids. Structure demonstrates priorities. Make your child’s sleep a priority. The structure is also teaching your children responsibility and stewardship. When children know what’s expected of them, then they can be held accountable. Structure is good for growing children. Bedtime is no exception. Bedtime needs to be a structured time.  
2. Safe. Children that feel safe sleep more soundly and securely. Your children need to feel safe and be safe at bed time. Make sure you address any fears your child has. Fix their room so they feel physically safe. Don’t tell ghost stories or talk about scary stuff before bed time. Bedtime needs to be a safe time. 
3. Special. Connect with your children at bedtime. They are not sheep to put in a pen at bedtime. They are your God-given offspring who will one day be putting your grandkids to bed. Make bedtime a magical, special time. If you rush bedtime you are disconnecting with your children. Bedtime doesn’t need to last forever, but make it special. Do special things that your children will remember for a lifetime. Bedtime needs to be a special time.

–Read a bedtime story and a Bible story to your kids at bed time. Reading relaxes the mind. Even better, when the reading stretches the mind toward heaven or towards some far away distant land or distant time. Children often dream of the last things they hear or see–make them positive images or thoughts.

–If you have given your kids electronic devices, don’t allow them in their rooms at night. Make your kids “check” them in with you at bed time. Your kids don’t need electronics at or after bed time.

–Wind them down, don’t stir them up. Don’t give your kids too many extra charges of adrenaline at bed-time. It makes it harder for them to go to sleep. I am terrible at this. I love stirring my kids up, then when I’ve had enough, I try to make them go to sleep. This formula never works well!

–Teach them how to pray beyond “Now I Lay Me”. Teaching your child to prayer is the most effective way to teach them how to overcome nightmares and bad dreams. Teach your child that they can wake up in the middle of the night and God will still hear their prayers. This is an effective way to help a child go back to sleep. Prayer is an extremely good promoter of sleep.

–Actually, pray with them at bed time. Get on your knees beside your child’s bed and pray with them. This helps the security of your child’s mind and spirit rest easier. Children trust in God until you or the world teach them not to.  You want to leave a powerful image in your children’s mind as they grow up: kneel with them at bed time.

–Give your child a big hug and kiss at bed time. Your children need healthy affection. Your hug and kiss gives your child needed healthy affection. It is instilling a deep value in your child: your love. A hug and kiss communicates to a child’s heart that you love and value them–that they are accepted.

–If you discipline your child at bedtime, then make up with them before they go to sleep. Don’t let your child wonder, “Do Mommy and Daddy still love me?” It is your job as a parent to restore and “right” the relationship with your child. A right relationship with your children help them sleep better.

-Don’t fight at night in front of your children. When you yell and scream and throw and break things or worse, your children will not sleep well. Learn how to communicate or go to counseling, but all your anger is damaging your children.

–Create a peaceful, ordered home. Children will drop from exhaustion anywhere, but they will go sleep better if their home is ordered. An ordered environment promotes peace. When things are dirty, cluttered and messy a child gets use to it, but it’s not actually helping the child to sleep. I have found that disordered homes often have disordered sleep. Sleep works best on a schedule. A schedule requires order.

A good night’s sleep does a world of good. It will do your child a world of good. And your child might just do more good in the world! Promote peace. Promote sleep for your child. Make your child’s sleep a priority.

“In peace I will both lie down and sleep, For You alone, O LORD, make me to dwell in safety.” Psalm 4:8

(c) Redwall, LLC. 2016